What God wants

 

"As I crave Him, more and more I find Him to be the deepest satisfaction of my soul"

- Precept Bible study on the Sermon on the Mount

How much do I crave righteousness? 

In honestly answering this question I realized that I am consistently inconsistent in this area. 

I crave

reach

find satisfaction

settle into routine

plateau

fizzle

spark

(repeat)

While my spiritual growth should continue stair stepping higher or maybe even climbing a gradual incline I find myself doing loop-de-loops that eventually lead slightly higher than previously.

Yet, the greatest thing that I can take pride in is the Lord. I squander so much time elsewhere, forgetting his steadfast love, justice, and righteousness. Forgetting that He delights in me.
Simply me.

Recently I went through a powerful exercise looking at mighty men of faith looking for what set them apart and searching out their greatest achievement. I expected to turn to lists of accomplishments - military, political, spiritual, ministerial. But, no. 

In the life of David  (Psalm 27, 63, 143) -- He pursued God, sacrificed joyfully, sang with a melody to God, God lifts his head, he craves/thirsts/seeks God, reaching to God, soul longing for God, recalls God's blessings.

Isaiah (Isaiah 6, 55) -- Saw God's glory, felt the tremble of His voice, recognized his sinfulness, seeks God, calls others to join him, recognizes God's thoughts as far above his own.

Moses (Exodus 33) -- (I love this!) He pitched a tent outside the camp, God met and spoke with him, God would block the doorway as they met together - protective of their time together- speaking as friends, just watching this caused others to worship God, wouldn't move without God's presence, God's presence with His people sets them apart - they could not continue without it.

Paul (Philippians 3) -- any personal gain is loss compared to knowing Christ, only seeking Him matters, no self-righteousness, only faith in Christ matters, pressed on to own it, never thinking we've arrived. 

Which brings me back to the mirror. What can set me apart?

What is God asking of me?

Those quiet times, set aside just for Him.
All that I can do -- ministry, momming, wife, daughter, teacher, steward -- none of it really matters. 

God flat out loves me and treasures those times of connectedness above all else. 

The times I could burst because I crave to be alone with Him, the times my pen can't keep up with my gratitude and expressions of love for Him. 

He loves when I 

pursue Him, 

crave Him,

 recognize my weakness without Him,

 get so lost in His presence I can almost see His glory 

and feel the tremble of His voice speaking to me, 

when I fully surrender to his agenda and rip up mine, 

When I'm jealous of my time with Him. 

That's what He asks. That's what He values. That's what He died for.