Monday, September 5, 2011
Verse of the Week -- Psalm 46
1 God is our refuge and strength, a very present help in trouble.
2 Therefore we will not fear though the earth gives way, though the mountains be moved into the heart of the sea,
3 though its waters roar and foam, though the mountains tremble at its swelling. Selah
4 There is a river whose streams make glad the city of God, the holy habitation of the Most High.
5 God is in the midst of her; she shall not be moved; God will help her when morning dawns.
6 The nations rage, the kingdoms totter; he utters his voice, the earth melts.
7 The LORD of hosts is with us; the God of Jacob is our fortress. Selah
8 Come, behold the works of the LORD, how he has brought desolations on the earth.
9 He makes wars cease to the end of the earth; he breaks the bow and shatters the spear; he burns the chariots with fire.
10 "Be still, and know that I am God. I will be exalted among the nations, I will be exalted in the earth!"
11 The LORD of hosts is with us; the God of Jacob is our fortress. Selah
Fear can cripple even the best of us.
In church this weekend the preacher spoke of fear, framed in the reminder of God's power and might to save us.
I came home, naming my looming fear and still foolishly hiding from the mental security that God offers.
Mulling that chain on my life I step into the garden to grab some vegetables for dinner and there I see a visual illustration of my life lately. Lots of growth. Vines twist and turn out of control over the whole patch. Cantaloupe. Planted unintentionally, and growing rapidly. Various squash staking their own territory. Tomatoes ripping up their stakes with their exploding branches.
That's been my life, my home, recently. So much growth, so much learning, so much to soak in. However, the fruit is not so pretty or abundant. The information and challenging situations continue to grow me, but unchecked I become just a nuisance vine with loads of information and no real fruit to show for it.
That's my fear in a way, that I will miss opportunities. So much blessing, so much learning, so much potential within our home, and yet . . . The fruit remains hidden. I fear missed opportunities in the midst of all the busy-ness. Missed opportunities with my kids, for my kids, in ministry, in sharing my faith, in the future.
I start to move leaves, search out the areas of growth and begin to see the start of fruit. It is there, just small and unrealized.
It may sound silly, but sometimes I fear that having children and being so busy at home pulls me away from greater opportunity for Christ. I never realized how all consuming motherhood would be, and sometimes I feel that the fruit is hidden in it all. I really wrestle with this and fear missing how God wants to use me outside the home now and later. Will I be all used up by the time the kids are out of the house? Is there more I should be doing now to be a witness for Him?
Interesting that Satan can even use a desire to serve God to bring us down. Those sunglasses of doubt distort the blessing of motherhood into a shroud of restraint.
It comes back to trust. God has placed me here and walks with me. He gives me the incredible strength that I need to walk this path each day.
My responsibility lies not in fretting about what I might accomplish, but in trusting God through each day of faithfully living for Him where He has me. He didn't give us 6 kids to let them raise themselves and for me to jump into ministry elsewhere.
He has me here, right now. Still growing me, still ripening the fruit sometimes hidden beneath the leaves. He prunes and fences in and weeds as needed to make my life shine as brightly as possible for Him. The end result will be the sweetest, purest fruit. He has an agenda for me tomorrow and next week and next year, and as His word lights my path I'll see just enough to follow the right direction.
His strength, His wisdom, His plans, His steps, His outcomes, His blessings, His glory.
Psalm 46 with my personal applications sewn in:
1 God is our refuge and strength, a very present help in homeschooling. 2 Therefore we will not fear though the curriculum gives way, though the schedule be swallowed into the heart of life's interruptions, 3 though doubts roar and foam, though the lips quiver at algebra. Selah
4 There is a homeschool mom whose streams make glad the city of God, the holy habitation of the Most High. 5 God is in the midst of her; she shall not be moved; God will help her when morning dawns, and afternoon drags on. 6 The sibling rivalry rages, the toddler tantrums; He utters his voice, the earth melts. 7 The LORD of hosts is with us; the God of Jacob is our fortress. Selah
8 Come, (each morning) behold the works of the LORD, how he has brought desolations on the earth. 9 He makes rivalries cease to the end of the house; he breaks the frustration and shatters the complaints; he burns the mean notes with fire. 10 "Be still, and know that I am God. I will be exalted in your homeschool, I will be exalted in your home!" 11 The LORD of hosts is with us; the God of Jacob is our fortress. Selah