I quit
Every now and then, sometimes once a week, I'm ready to quit. Throw in the towel, enroll the kids in a traditional school and get a full time job.
Sounds like bliss - Crazy hour in the morning getting everyone out, then 8 straight hours of no sibling arguments, no six year olds screaming, no teenage snarky comments, no tears, no impenetrable learning concepts, nothing. Of course, followed by a couple crazy hours in the evening of homework and sports and dinner and bedtime.
And yet, I press on. For 20 years now I've been pressing on as a stay at home mom. The rewards are there, but not always easy to spot. But, God has clearly called me (us) to this and I know I need to persevere.
Today I really struggle. Kids in tears, me biting my tongue, school seeming impossible.
Fortunately, God gave me some nuggets earlier this week that I'm clinging to.
First, a precious but brief conversation with another homeschool mom recognizing the tantalizing appeal of work outside the home. It's a temptation that pulls our hearts where they don't belong. Maybe not for all, but for me I know I've seen that sense of satisfaction in some outside source as one that just drags me into greater discontent at home. Instead of freeing me to sink back into motherhood after a little reprieve it stirs up greater and greater craving for life "outside."
Second, a sweet snippet in the sermon this weekend about over-spiritualizing eternal rewards. He warned of a trap that Christians fall into and I noted especially in my own life. Throughout the Bible God promises rewards - heaven, peace, crowns, "Well Done," and more for a life well lived. Yet, I often choose to focus on "eternal" rewards in a very broad sense and feel like focusing too much on anything I receive personally is selfish and lacking humility, hense diminishing the reward.
Landon pointed out in his sermon that God would not have put them there if he didn't want us to reach for them.
When it's rough, think about the crown.
When discouragement sets in, think about God's affirmation.
When I want to quit remember that mansion in the works.
There is a tangible reward in the next life for persevering in this life. I cannot tell you what a difference that has made in my mental motivation this week and on this day in particular.
Still not easy. But, pressing on because God has clearly shown me His plans and has given the words of affirmation that I need to get through today and try again tomorrow.
Sounds like bliss - Crazy hour in the morning getting everyone out, then 8 straight hours of no sibling arguments, no six year olds screaming, no teenage snarky comments, no tears, no impenetrable learning concepts, nothing. Of course, followed by a couple crazy hours in the evening of homework and sports and dinner and bedtime.
And yet, I press on. For 20 years now I've been pressing on as a stay at home mom. The rewards are there, but not always easy to spot. But, God has clearly called me (us) to this and I know I need to persevere.
Today I really struggle. Kids in tears, me biting my tongue, school seeming impossible.
Fortunately, God gave me some nuggets earlier this week that I'm clinging to.
First, a precious but brief conversation with another homeschool mom recognizing the tantalizing appeal of work outside the home. It's a temptation that pulls our hearts where they don't belong. Maybe not for all, but for me I know I've seen that sense of satisfaction in some outside source as one that just drags me into greater discontent at home. Instead of freeing me to sink back into motherhood after a little reprieve it stirs up greater and greater craving for life "outside."
Second, a sweet snippet in the sermon this weekend about over-spiritualizing eternal rewards. He warned of a trap that Christians fall into and I noted especially in my own life. Throughout the Bible God promises rewards - heaven, peace, crowns, "Well Done," and more for a life well lived. Yet, I often choose to focus on "eternal" rewards in a very broad sense and feel like focusing too much on anything I receive personally is selfish and lacking humility, hense diminishing the reward.
Landon pointed out in his sermon that God would not have put them there if he didn't want us to reach for them.
When it's rough, think about the crown.
When discouragement sets in, think about God's affirmation.
When I want to quit remember that mansion in the works.
There is a tangible reward in the next life for persevering in this life. I cannot tell you what a difference that has made in my mental motivation this week and on this day in particular.
Still not easy. But, pressing on because God has clearly shown me His plans and has given the words of affirmation that I need to get through today and try again tomorrow.
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